Friday, June 22, 2012
Manifold Destiny: The One! The Only! Guide To Cooking On Your Car Engine! (ILL of the day)
Captain ILL was helping me return books this morning and he paused dramatically when he saw this title. Apparently it reminded him of the time he was helping Batman with a tricky case while he was between Robins. Batman had left The Captain in the parked batmobile while he went into a bank to cash a batcheck. Captain ILL decided this would be a good opportunity to eat his lunch, so he pulled his Six Million Dollar Man lunchbox out from under the batseat and discovered that his valet had packed him a box of frozen microwaveable macaroni and cheese. After ten minutes of searching for the batmicrowave, he concluded that the Dark Knight had overlooked an important element in batmobile design. Fortunately the keys were in the ignition, so it was the work of a moment for our industrious Captain to start it up and pop the hood. He studied the engine for some time but couldn't locate the manifold. There were lots of flashing lights and a beam of coruscating energy that looked promising, so he dropped the packet of mac and cheese into that after first carefully peeling the corner of the plastic film back to allow steam to escape. Twenty long minutes later Batman returned to find a still hungry Captain ILL sitting innocently in the passenger seat of a mostly melted batmobile. That was the last time The Captain used a car for cooking and, coincidentally, also the last time he worked with Batman.
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