While the superheroes union strictly forbids carrying guns, Captain ILL understands that many persons who are not able to shoot lasers out of their eyeballs do carry firearms. In fact, according to the back cover of Stayin' Alive: Armed and Female In an Unsafe World, 27% of American women keep a gun in their home. The Captain isn't really qualified to take a stand on this issue since bullets tend to bounce off his skin, and the aforementioned laser beams, however he is getting tired of mending the bullet holes in his costume all the time. Captain ILL doesn't have a very big crimefighting budget, so he can't afford one of those fancy costumes made up of unstable molecules, so at the end of a hard day of booting evil, his costume often looks like a superhero-shaped swiss cheese. So ladies, please make sure you don't exercise your right to bear arms on dashing superheroes with poor sewing skills.
Monday, July 7, 2008
Interlibrary Loan of last Thursday
While the superheroes union strictly forbids carrying guns, Captain ILL understands that many persons who are not able to shoot lasers out of their eyeballs do carry firearms. In fact, according to the back cover of Stayin' Alive: Armed and Female In an Unsafe World, 27% of American women keep a gun in their home. The Captain isn't really qualified to take a stand on this issue since bullets tend to bounce off his skin, and the aforementioned laser beams, however he is getting tired of mending the bullet holes in his costume all the time. Captain ILL doesn't have a very big crimefighting budget, so he can't afford one of those fancy costumes made up of unstable molecules, so at the end of a hard day of booting evil, his costume often looks like a superhero-shaped swiss cheese. So ladies, please make sure you don't exercise your right to bear arms on dashing superheroes with poor sewing skills.
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2 comments:
Silly me. When I first saw the title I thought perhaps it was an autobiography on the Bee Gees.
I sure hope that our good El Capitan isn't going around climbing into any ladies' windows in the wee hours of the morning. Thinking that they need rescuing of course! In the dark his costume wouldn't be visible to the mere human eye. But, that'd be the only reason that I personally can think of anyone pulling any kind of weapon on him. :-)
Jazz, you can be assured that Captain ILL doesn't go around climbing into ladies' windows unless he's been invited, and even then he prefers to use a door.
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