The Origins of Christmas is a book that answers important questions like: "When was Christmas first celebrated?" and "How did December 25th become its date?". There doesn't seem to be much about Santa Claus in this book, which is very disappointing to Captain ILL as he is a big fan of Mr. Claus. Knowing this, you can imagine how honored he was to get a call a number of years back in late December from a very ill Santa. He had come down with a particularly debilitating virus, and could barely summon the strength to beg Captain ILL to take over his duties on Christmas Eve. Of course the Captain already had plans but you don't say no to Santa, so he packed a bag and caught the next reindeer to the North Pole. What a place! Snow, toys, elves, reindeer - everything you would expect and more. There was barely time to learn how to pilot the sleigh before taking off for the south. Captain ILL doesn't remember much about that night, between the breakneck speed of the trip, and the bottle of whiskey he found under the seat. Luckily the reindeer knew the route, and most of the presents ended up where they belonged. However, if you remember a Christmas several years ago when you got a bag of turnips instead of a Barbie Doll, don't blame Santa Claus; Captain ILL is very sorry.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Interlibrary Loan of the day
The Origins of Christmas is a book that answers important questions like: "When was Christmas first celebrated?" and "How did December 25th become its date?". There doesn't seem to be much about Santa Claus in this book, which is very disappointing to Captain ILL as he is a big fan of Mr. Claus. Knowing this, you can imagine how honored he was to get a call a number of years back in late December from a very ill Santa. He had come down with a particularly debilitating virus, and could barely summon the strength to beg Captain ILL to take over his duties on Christmas Eve. Of course the Captain already had plans but you don't say no to Santa, so he packed a bag and caught the next reindeer to the North Pole. What a place! Snow, toys, elves, reindeer - everything you would expect and more. There was barely time to learn how to pilot the sleigh before taking off for the south. Captain ILL doesn't remember much about that night, between the breakneck speed of the trip, and the bottle of whiskey he found under the seat. Luckily the reindeer knew the route, and most of the presents ended up where they belonged. However, if you remember a Christmas several years ago when you got a bag of turnips instead of a Barbie Doll, don't blame Santa Claus; Captain ILL is very sorry.
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6 comments:
Shame on you for suggesting that Santa drinks and drives.
Queenie, I'm afraid that Captain ILL is right, though he was a bit indiscreet in giving away details of my private life. Since Rudolph does all the driving, I'm really only a passenger so I occasionally have a little nip to take the chill away (you wouldn't believe the wind chill factor on a sleigh traveling at hypersonic speeds).
Ho ho ho!
I've waited most of my life to hear from Santa...odd that it should happen now. Whatever happened to those Presto Sparkle Paints I asked for when I was a little kid?
Your sister must have stolen them.
I have two sisters.
No doubt a conspiracy of sisters was at work.
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